I need to update more. :P

So.. remember that date with the guy that fixed my dishwasher. Yeah. He never called me back. So... whatever. His loss. Though it's making my current situation awkward. My sink and dishwasher are both clogged now, and I haven't put in a maintenance request because I don't want him coming to fix it unless I know I'll be gone all day. There are other maintenance guys, but... yeah. Aaaaaawkwaaaaard...

But regardless, it's a good thing, because I met another guy. On a dating website *gasp!* He's so much cuter and basically just more awesome. We seem to have a lot in common and a similar sense of humor. :D We had coffee on Sunday where we sat and talked for like, 2 hours, and now I am crushing on him like crazy. He wants to take it slow and be friends first which I totally understand. I'm just afraid some other girl will swoop in and snatch him up before we get to the boyfriend/girlfriend stage. :( Then I would have to cry. But I think he likes me. We've been texting each other non-stop since about Saturday, he resubscribed to WoW once we found out we had characters on the same server, and he practically begged me to start playing Warhammer Online.

I hope this works out. I really like him. A lot. ^_^;;;

No. Just... no. We have enough people already. We don't need to be making more of the same ones we already have. We're busy enough making new ones.

The civil rights for clones would be a nightmare. And in all honesty... why the hell would anyone want a clone of themselves? It would just be like having a twin. It looks like you, but it isn't you.

Being able to clone single organs is one thing. But cloning a whole person... it's not something we need to be doing. We're doing just fine making people the old fashioned way.

So...

Guess who has two thumbs and just got asked out on a date?

*points thumbs at herself* This guy!

The guy that came to fix my dishwasher just asked me out on a date. :D Not bad considering I'd just gotten home from work, I don't have make up on, and I'm all sweaty and gross. ^_^;;;

*squee!*

I was going through some old entries and found this. Now that all of the music on my iPod is MY music, I thought I would give it another shot

1. Open your music player (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, etc).
2. Put it on shuffle.
3. Press play.
4. For every question type the song that’s playing. When you go to a new question press the next button.

( The Soundtrack of my Life )

I had to skip Pirelli's Miracle Elixer like 3 times... @_@ I need to edit my playlist methinks.

Yeah.

2009. What a ride.

Got a new president, broke up with a fiancee, dated someone else, and decided that I was happier just being single for a while. My Theme for this year has been New Perspective by Panic! At The Disco. I feel like I really kind of turned my life around. I ditched all of my pseudo-friends who couldn't even be bothered to call me, made a new batch of friend that to generally make the effort to at least text me and say hi. Finally, a New Years Resolution that I kept! This year's resolution is to lose 50 lbs. 1 lb a week for a year. I will almost be back down to the weight I was at when I graduated from college in 2005. I gained a lot of weight in 3 and a half years. And really, I'm disgusting. I weight over 300 lbs. Well over. This is a Bad Thing.

I'm trying not to drink soda anymore. Last night at the gas station, instead of grabbing a Mt. Dew, I got a Life Water. I have a 2 liter of Pepsi that I am going to finish, because it would be a waste of money not to finish it. But after that is gone, no more soda in my house. It will all be water and tea.

I'm also going to try and take Sadie on AT LEAST a 15 minute walk every day. I say at least because if the weather is nice, I don't mind walking longer. But if it's crappy, I don't want to be out for very long, and I don't want her out that long. She's old.

Other than that, I'm really starting to think about a family. Which is interesting seeing as I don't even have a boyfriend yet. But hey. I can think about it. They biological clock is ticking like a time bomb now, and I know I'm not getting any younger. I don't want to be 35 and having my first baby, you know? I would like to have a child by the time I'm 30. So... a couple more years, I guess. I don't know. We'll just see where life takes me.

I'm working full time, I'm slowly paying off my debts, and basically, I'm doing okay.

I just hope 2010 is better than 2009, and not worse than 2007. 2007 was a fucking bitch.

PS: I got an iPod Touch for Christmas. And Rock Band 2. :D

Wow.

So, I had an awesome dream last night. It was also... strange.

It was a sexy dream about one of my friend who, in all honestly, I would jump in a heartbeat given the opportunity (but I'm not 95 lbs, and he has a girlfriend so it will never happen). It was... very good.

The strange part though was that later in the dream he got into a car accident and went to the hospital after he left my apartment. We went to visit him and I kissed him.

It was strange. But like I said, it was a *very* good dream up until that part. *^^*

Gah, I haven't updated in over a month! Bad me.

Well, my birthday was Nov. 23, officially making me 28 years old. I've had this LJ for 7 years now. I can hardly believe it. @_@ 7 years ago, I was sitting in my dorm at OSU, muddling through my first year of university. Now I've graduated, and am doing a job that only requires a GED.

I'm free and single for the first time in almost 4 years. That's interesting. It's a lot like being with someone, only I live on my own, and am allowed to notice cute boys without feeling bad.

I'm working full time now, that might explain the lack of updates. I've been busybusybusy for the last month.

I find myself starting to regret breaking it off with Tim. I still have his stuff that I need to send back, but I'm a huge chicken about calling and asking for his address. I admit that I was a pretty harsh bitch to him when we broke up. I mean, I think it needed to happen, regardless. I was spazzing about the whole "getting married" thing, and we'd just seen his family who were all "OMG WHEN U GETTING MARRIED!?" and I just kind of was like o.o because I wanted to wait until he was done with school, and being married and living 2000 miles apart just... didn't appeal to me.

When I get married, I want to be able to settle down into my own house after the honeymoon. I want to come back to a white picket fence, and a dog (because obviously there wouldn't be children in the oh so perfect marriage until at least 9 months after the honeymoon).

So... I don't know. Part of me wants to beg for him to take me back, and another part wants to just kind of... absorb the being single thing. After all, he's still all the way in New Mexico. I don't really want to be in a long distance relationship again. It sucks. I think he may simply end up being The One That Got Away. :\

Though I am going to see if he'll be up here around Christmas. Maybe we can have coffee or something. If I don't chicken out. >.>

I'm sick. Which is lame because I'd just agreed to work the rest of this week. I had a scratchy throat when the boss called, but I thought it was just from going to see mc chris on Saturday. Not because I was getting sick. :\

I haven't gotten any of the jobs I've applied for. Which is super lame. I really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really don't want to be in housekeeping anymore. I want a job that I can be proud of. A job that I am not embarassed to tell people what I do. I mean, I'm a fucking janitor, which is fine when you're young, but I'm almost 30! I shouldn't be mopping up shit and puke for a living! It's just not professional. I mean, I have a college degree for Christ's sake! I am a smart woman!

I've been applying for desk jobs like crazy at the hospital, and I keep getting shot down. I also put in for a full time position at the hosptial in housekeeping, and another application for another clinical receptionist position. I've looked at craigslist a few times, but there's never much there except for scams and the hospital needing RNs and CNAs.

In other news, I broke up with Mr. Wonderful. Turns out his lack of responsibility wasn't so wonderful. That and I just didn't feel a romantic connection once the honeymoon period was over. He was more baggage than I am ready to deal with. Srsly.

Other than that... well... even full time in housekeeping will be okay for now. I'll have every other weekend off, and I'll be able to afford things, and I will have health insurance. Maybe I can start seeing a psychiatrist and a nutritionist and stuff. Get myself together and get over this food thing. Now that I recognize I have a problem with it, it's easier to see the patterns of my bad behavior. Not easier to break, but easier to see.

Well the I love you is easy. I would tell my mom I love her.

As for I'm sorry... well, there are a lot of people I'd say sorry too.

I'd say sorry to Tim because I was retarded for breaking up with him. I think all of the marriage pressure got the better of me. Haven't really talked to him since, and I still need to return his things.

I'd probably also say sorry to Mehgan. Not because I believe I did anything wrong, necessarily, but just because the friendship ended so badly. Sometimes I wish we were still friends, because she is really awesome to hang out with and talk to and stuff. I just can't live with her.

There are probably others, but those are the only two that come to mind.

Happy (belated) birthday draelynnthered!!!! <3

I know I have an issue with food.

I mean, I'm sitting here looking at a webpage for Over-eaters Anonymous, while thinking about how much I am looking forward to getting a Whopper from Burger King in a little bit.

I would love to go to an Over-eaters Anonymous meeting, except that there is an uncomfortable level of religion for me. They claim not to be religious, but at the same time, all of the steps have prayers. And maybe I could even fudge it by saying it's just a mantra, but they all start with "God" or "Heavenly Father" or "My Creator" and I just can't handle that.

I am so far away from religious. I have no problem with people who chose to believe, as long as they have no problem with me choosing NOT to believe.

I don't know.

I just know I need to get my weight under control.

And the fucked up thing? I'm still going to go get that Whopper in a minute. I'm starving.

Just a quick entry.

OSU has denied my financial aid for this year, and the rest of eternity, so I was forced to drop out. I'm looking into grad schools buuuut...

I have an interview today for a position at the hospital. Administrative Assistant. It's a fancy name for a secretary, but the pay is pretty good ($15), and it's a full time 9-5 type job (well, 8:30 to 5, but who's counting?). Monday through Friday, with weekends and holidays off. This sounds amazing. I could pay off all of my bills, and still have time to hang out with my friends.

Wish me luck, everyone!

That's really all I have to say about that.

I got a letter today. A summons for jury duty. I'm excited. XD I've never had jury duty before. I've been registered to vote for 10 years, and this is the first time I've ever been called. It would be in October, but I am going to have them defer it until the summer when I can actually do it. I hope I get picked, and it's like some huge murder trial and we all have to be sequestered to a fancy pants hotel.

Yeah right. It will be some kid who robbed a liquor store or something. XD

Anyway.

My financial aid is still in limbo. Hopefully it will all be smoothed over and I will get my money. That would be nice. But my adviser finally got my letter of support done. So huzzah! I also finally have a full schedule. It's actually a really fucking awesome term. No classes on Wednesdays, one class on Monday (sometimes two, it's a teaching practicum class that meets once every few weeks just to check in and see how everyone is doing at their schools they've been assigned to assist in), and one class on Friday. Two classes on Tuesday, and Three on Friday.

Here is the schedule, just so you know. :D

Monday:
9am - Teaching Practicum
6pm - Myth and Imagery in Film

Tuesday:
Noon - Lindyhop (dance)
2pm - Short Story Writing

Wednesday:
SLLLEEEEEPPPPPP! And homework I guess.

Thursday:
Noon - Lindyhop
2pm - Short Story Writing
7pm - Beginning Swing

Friday:
10am - Ballroom I

I only have ONE book to buy this term! Holy shit! And a girl in that class said she would go half with me and we could share it. :D So... sweet. ^_^

There's other stuff too, but I don't want to bring down the tone of this happy post. I'll post more about it when it actually happens.

That seems about right.

I'm going to bed now.

I just read back over nearly 3 years of my life.

Wow.

Lots of bumps and twists and turns. Lots of good, and lots of bad. And also a pattern.

I seem to have been happiest when I was living at home with my mom. Probably because I had no real bills or anything. Hn. I also noticed that my life kind of has waves of good times, followed by waves of bad times. People I used to like, I don't like so much anymore. Situations that I thought were good at the time turned out to be not so good in the end...

I think I really just need to be alone for a while. Completely alone. Just time to focus on me.

This is why I think I really need that wave tattoo. Get a new perspective on life. Maybe on my birthday I will get it. 28 will be the year I change my point of view. Lots of self reflection and meditation about what I want.

I'm still too much of a people pleaser. I need to be a me pleaser. I think I've gotten better about it, but I'm only human. I still have lots of work to do. There are also decisions about boys to make. But I really think I should spend at least a year alone before I make any decisions. Get back in touch with ME, with absolutely no strings attached. Unless you count the dog as a string. :D

Here is one of my current favorite songs. Well... it's older, but I am currently enjoying it muchly.

Guilty Pleasure by Cobra Starship



Another song I've been digging a lot is the post-split Panic! at the Disco song called New Perspective. I really like it. I'm actually considering getting a tattoo of a wave somewhere. I probably won't because I'm not huge on tattoos, but... maybe. It would certainly represent this year. I have changed and grown a lot this year.

Neither. I prefer to stay at home. I have air conditioning, and movies are expensive. Though sometimes I go with my cousin to the movies. She works at a theater, so she can get in for free. :D

Cobra Starship isn't coming to Oregon. This makes me very sad. ;_;

Oh well. At least I have mc chris to look forward to in October. :D