I'm sick. Which is lame because I'd just agreed to work the rest of this week. I had a scratchy throat when the boss called, but I thought it was just from going to see mc chris on Saturday. Not because I was getting sick. :\

I haven't gotten any of the jobs I've applied for. Which is super lame. I really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really don't want to be in housekeeping anymore. I want a job that I can be proud of. A job that I am not embarassed to tell people what I do. I mean, I'm a fucking janitor, which is fine when you're young, but I'm almost 30! I shouldn't be mopping up shit and puke for a living! It's just not professional. I mean, I have a college degree for Christ's sake! I am a smart woman!

I've been applying for desk jobs like crazy at the hospital, and I keep getting shot down. I also put in for a full time position at the hosptial in housekeeping, and another application for another clinical receptionist position. I've looked at craigslist a few times, but there's never much there except for scams and the hospital needing RNs and CNAs.

In other news, I broke up with Mr. Wonderful. Turns out his lack of responsibility wasn't so wonderful. That and I just didn't feel a romantic connection once the honeymoon period was over. He was more baggage than I am ready to deal with. Srsly.

Other than that... well... even full time in housekeeping will be okay for now. I'll have every other weekend off, and I'll be able to afford things, and I will have health insurance. Maybe I can start seeing a psychiatrist and a nutritionist and stuff. Get myself together and get over this food thing. Now that I recognize I have a problem with it, it's easier to see the patterns of my bad behavior. Not easier to break, but easier to see.

Well the I love you is easy. I would tell my mom I love her.

As for I'm sorry... well, there are a lot of people I'd say sorry too.

I'd say sorry to Tim because I was retarded for breaking up with him. I think all of the marriage pressure got the better of me. Haven't really talked to him since, and I still need to return his things.

I'd probably also say sorry to Mehgan. Not because I believe I did anything wrong, necessarily, but just because the friendship ended so badly. Sometimes I wish we were still friends, because she is really awesome to hang out with and talk to and stuff. I just can't live with her.

There are probably others, but those are the only two that come to mind.

Happy (belated) birthday draelynnthered!!!! <3

I know I have an issue with food.

I mean, I'm sitting here looking at a webpage for Over-eaters Anonymous, while thinking about how much I am looking forward to getting a Whopper from Burger King in a little bit.

I would love to go to an Over-eaters Anonymous meeting, except that there is an uncomfortable level of religion for me. They claim not to be religious, but at the same time, all of the steps have prayers. And maybe I could even fudge it by saying it's just a mantra, but they all start with "God" or "Heavenly Father" or "My Creator" and I just can't handle that.

I am so far away from religious. I have no problem with people who chose to believe, as long as they have no problem with me choosing NOT to believe.

I don't know.

I just know I need to get my weight under control.

And the fucked up thing? I'm still going to go get that Whopper in a minute. I'm starving.

Just a quick entry.

OSU has denied my financial aid for this year, and the rest of eternity, so I was forced to drop out. I'm looking into grad schools buuuut...

I have an interview today for a position at the hospital. Administrative Assistant. It's a fancy name for a secretary, but the pay is pretty good ($15), and it's a full time 9-5 type job (well, 8:30 to 5, but who's counting?). Monday through Friday, with weekends and holidays off. This sounds amazing. I could pay off all of my bills, and still have time to hang out with my friends.

Wish me luck, everyone!

That's really all I have to say about that.

I got a letter today. A summons for jury duty. I'm excited. XD I've never had jury duty before. I've been registered to vote for 10 years, and this is the first time I've ever been called. It would be in October, but I am going to have them defer it until the summer when I can actually do it. I hope I get picked, and it's like some huge murder trial and we all have to be sequestered to a fancy pants hotel.

Yeah right. It will be some kid who robbed a liquor store or something. XD

Anyway.

My financial aid is still in limbo. Hopefully it will all be smoothed over and I will get my money. That would be nice. But my adviser finally got my letter of support done. So huzzah! I also finally have a full schedule. It's actually a really fucking awesome term. No classes on Wednesdays, one class on Monday (sometimes two, it's a teaching practicum class that meets once every few weeks just to check in and see how everyone is doing at their schools they've been assigned to assist in), and one class on Friday. Two classes on Tuesday, and Three on Friday.

Here is the schedule, just so you know. :D

Monday:
9am - Teaching Practicum
6pm - Myth and Imagery in Film

Tuesday:
Noon - Lindyhop (dance)
2pm - Short Story Writing

Wednesday:
SLLLEEEEEPPPPPP! And homework I guess.

Thursday:
Noon - Lindyhop
2pm - Short Story Writing
7pm - Beginning Swing

Friday:
10am - Ballroom I

I only have ONE book to buy this term! Holy shit! And a girl in that class said she would go half with me and we could share it. :D So... sweet. ^_^

There's other stuff too, but I don't want to bring down the tone of this happy post. I'll post more about it when it actually happens.

That seems about right.

I'm going to bed now.

I just read back over nearly 3 years of my life.

Wow.

Lots of bumps and twists and turns. Lots of good, and lots of bad. And also a pattern.

I seem to have been happiest when I was living at home with my mom. Probably because I had no real bills or anything. Hn. I also noticed that my life kind of has waves of good times, followed by waves of bad times. People I used to like, I don't like so much anymore. Situations that I thought were good at the time turned out to be not so good in the end...

I think I really just need to be alone for a while. Completely alone. Just time to focus on me.

This is why I think I really need that wave tattoo. Get a new perspective on life. Maybe on my birthday I will get it. 28 will be the year I change my point of view. Lots of self reflection and meditation about what I want.

I'm still too much of a people pleaser. I need to be a me pleaser. I think I've gotten better about it, but I'm only human. I still have lots of work to do. There are also decisions about boys to make. But I really think I should spend at least a year alone before I make any decisions. Get back in touch with ME, with absolutely no strings attached. Unless you count the dog as a string. :D

Here is one of my current favorite songs. Well... it's older, but I am currently enjoying it muchly.

Guilty Pleasure by Cobra Starship



Another song I've been digging a lot is the post-split Panic! at the Disco song called New Perspective. I really like it. I'm actually considering getting a tattoo of a wave somewhere. I probably won't because I'm not huge on tattoos, but... maybe. It would certainly represent this year. I have changed and grown a lot this year.

Neither. I prefer to stay at home. I have air conditioning, and movies are expensive. Though sometimes I go with my cousin to the movies. She works at a theater, so she can get in for free. :D

Cobra Starship isn't coming to Oregon. This makes me very sad. ;_;

Oh well. At least I have mc chris to look forward to in October. :D

I joined the Twitter revolution.

@akijade is anyone wants to follow me.

Annoyance. I has it.

So I'm finally sitting down to do all of the paperwork for school that I should have done ages ago. I get ready to plan out my schedule for the next year and... wtf? I can't view my transcripts. I can't remember how many classes I've taken, let alone which ones. I've been in college for like, 7 years! For a fucking bachelors! So I go with the last year, because that had most of the classes I needed, then I go to look at my holds. Yep. There it is. And as a bonus, I also can't register for classes until I pay them.

So shit.

I'm annoyed.

At least I still have a month before classes start. But I would still like to get this finished up sooner rather than later. I have to get a bunch of A's for the next two terms. Like... straight A's. It shouldn't be too hard, but there are a lot of classes that I have to retake. Which is annoying as well, but that is my own fault for slacking off.

As a bonus though, I might end up with one day a week off. And as much as my instinct says I should work that extra day, I need a day to rest. Even God rested for a day, amirite?

So... yeah. It will get cleared up. I'm just annoyed.

For anyone who stuck through that rant, I thank you. And as a reward, here's a picture of my pretty cross that my little Christian Vampire wears (if you're curious, IM me on Yahoo @ jade27_al and I will tell you all about her and wtf a christian vampire is. :D



I just added the gem beads to the eyes this afternoon. I think it's pretty awesome looking, and finally matches the rest of her outfit better.

...

I think this is the most retarded question I have ever seen. And LJ has had some really stupid questions.

lol

Just got back from seeing the new Harry Potter movie!

( Not really Spoilers, but I'll still cut it to be nice )

Now off to sleep. I have to work in 3 and a half hours. :D

Stolen from genuinelie

Your result for Roleplayer Test! ...
The Smutfic

Random, Action-Oriented, Sexual

You are the Smutfic, most at home in sex games and dressing rooms. You like your roleplay quick and dirty (or sometimes agonizingly long and descriptive), and you play for either sex or pairings -- you don't discriminate much. Like the Shipper, it's the romantic and sexual tension between characters that interests you, but unlike your sister style, you'd much rather move on to the action than drag it out. Sex is certainly not all you want (if character didn't matter, you wouldn't be roleplaying, would you?), but complicated plots bore you. And unfortunately, you're easily bored. Once the sex logs are done with, you're usually gone doing something (or someone) else.

http://www.helloquizzy.com/tests/roleplayer-test

Do any of you have any interest in playing Ken?

theblackcross

My game just lost it's Ken and is kind of stalled out at the moment. However once we get a new Ken, things will pick up. It's usually very active, so don't let the fact that the latest thread hasn't been updated in 2 weeks fool you.

Lots of Yaoi, just so you know.

Brad and Schu are like rabbits. >.>